To, Sarabjit...!

Sarabjit, 

I know what you are thinking

when you are in coma.

You are in middle of the your field,

You enjoy being here, 

even in scorching sun,

This golden color, and the smell of wheat 

you feel like heaven...

you see your wife coming to you,

with Rotis

and your two little daughters.

running behind her. 

You don't know how happy you are.

Sarabjit, Sarabjit...                                                          

I know 

you don't want to come out of coma,

you don't want to face the truth,

but you know this for sure subconciously

that you are in jail

away from your home

You can't even meet your family

And people don't even believe 

who you are.

You start writing to everyone,

to you family, to your country,

you cry for help,

you beg for justice,

you keep hope from this country,

from your country, from humanity

and all you get is a death penalty

for the crime you don't even know.

No no..you are loosing hopes,

you don't want to see it,

you don't want think about it. 

Sarabjit,

You see your brave sister fighting for you

you see diplomats talking about you

you see media talking about you

you get a mercy petition, 

and you meet your family at Wagha border. 

It's been a long time

You have seen your daughters 

They have grown to become beautiful ladies

you can't stop your tears. 

You see your wife,

You can't recognize her,

What happened to her?

She has got so many wrinkles,

lost so much of weight, lost her charm,

it seems she has not eaten since a long time.

And then you meet your sister,

you start crying on her arms

like a little baby.

You can't thank her enough

She put everything she can

to get you back. 

Sarabjit,

you are hallucinating Sarabjit.

You know it Sarabjit,

It doesn't matter 

whether you are a spy or a mistaken identity

the fact is you are Indian

and you will pay for it in their soil. 

You will be abused 

whenever an Indian batsman hits a six

You will be tormented, tortured

whenever India wins - 

a war or a cricket match. 

And you will be killed

even if a terrorist gets killed in this land here. 

You know it, don't you?

You know your fate.

you know what happened to those 54 PoWs,

locked in the darkness for 42 years.

When India was celebrating victory,

on streets and on roads,

with loudspeakers and horns

in All India radio and Doordarshan,

they were getting beaten

with rods and whips.

Haven't seen them,

watching TV and crying 

while their wives receiving posthumous award

for heroics and bravery of their husbands -

'killed-in-action'?

You met them in the jail, 

didn't you Sarabjit ?

you have seen them 

getting tormented daily,

getting tortured daily, 

and still you are hopeful?

Sarabjit,

Let's admit the truth

that no one cares. 

you can cry as much as you like,

shout as much as you want,

but who is there to listen?

Sarabjit,

You are awake since a long time

They didn't let you sleep

in that small cellular.

You are very tired,

You are in agonizing pain,

It's the only chance, 

Stop thinking now, 

Go to deep sleep Sarabjit!

                                        - Rajesh 'Arya'

A Poet's Agony

Long gone are the days
when 'pens were mightier than swords'.
For there is no fight now
between a pen
and a sword.
There is nothing
that pierces through the emotions
or cuts through the throat.

You don't fear either of them,
don't care about either of them,
because you are aware of much bigger terror
that comes unnoticed and suddenly,
that resides in your mind always,
but you choose to ignore it,
because you know
you can do nothing.

You are walking down the street,
just like another day
and suddenly,
boom......!!
Your body flings in the air
in pieces.
Before you could think
what kind of war it is -you are dead.

But it's not only you die
your soul dies with it
and so are your dreams,
your faith,
and so your desire to reborn, if any

because you didn't receive at all
a fair 'death'.
Yes it was not a death,
you were long waiting for.
When you have grown old,
you've fulfilled your responsibility,
you are satisfied,
and now you are ready to die.
You die - suddenly and unexpectedly,
leaving everything aside.

But then for this sacrifice,
you don't expect me
to write a poem, right?
Because I can't write an elegy or a dirge,
for there is no dead body remaining
and there is no funeral.
And I don't know a poem,
to lament for a dead 'soul'.

The fact is,
the poet inside me is long dead.
Now nothing creative,
nothing inspirational,
nothing positive -that comes out of me.
It's just anger and frustration.
The ink has turned red,
strength of both - pen and the sword,
but still not able to stand -the hatred, the fanaticism, the madness,
the mindless killings.
What can you fight with a sword,
unless there is a known enemy?
What can you fight with a pen,
unless there is a rational conflict?
So what you do ?
You just watch,
and wait for your turn.

But while alive,
often, with every incident,
you have to bear the pain,
of being a poet,
whose poems are impotent.
And in frustration,
You curse those people -who made nice proverbs,
who wrote inspirational poems,
and who said great things about this race
with great faith and trust.
                                - Rajesh 'Arya'

My Dear Valentine !

My Dear Valentine!

I know 

that you are upset 

that I didn't come 

to celebrate 

this day with you. 

Though I don't believe 

in waiting for a occasion

to express

how much I much I love you,

I would've celebrated it with you

because I feel great 

to see you happy. 

But then - 

Dearest Valentine!

Where you wanted to celebrate?

In the city 

Where the so called protectors of culture

would come

and beat us at will,

citing how their morals are higher than ours.

Or in the village 

Where in the name of 'caste'

and to save their so called 'honor'

they won't mind even killing us.

Source: http://www.freeimageslive.co.uk

When you wanted to celebrate?

During broad daylight,

When with every footsteps together

we would be welcomed with abusive comments

and we would move forward

pretending we didn't hear anything.

Or during the night,

when we would be walking

in constant fear

that I shouldn't loose you

in the hands of human beasts

who roam in running buses.

What you wanted to celebrate?

A Hallmark day,

to express how much we love each other

through the cards and gifts

bought at exorbitant price.

Or an occasion,

to be a part of 

this crowd -

these flocks of beautiful couples,

which try to represent,

just for the sake of representing,

that how proud it is of being 'western'. 

So My Dearmost Valentine,

Let's not be sad

that we couldn't celebrate this day.

Let's promise on this day

to spread love 

in and around us

as much as we can,

so that we don't have to think

'Where', 'When', 'What' ?

And we don't have to wait

for this 'day' either

for there shouldn't be a single passing day

when we didn't love

or didn't get loved ! 

- Rajesh 'Arya'

14th Feb 2013

In company of Prof. Roddam Narasimha

Today India is celebrating 64th Republic Day and I must say I am feeling proud of being Indian. I am sure a lot of people will object,  "What makes you feel proud? The country is suffering from multiple problems starting from corruption, unequal rights, sexual biases, terrorism, communal tensions to ineffective governance !."

Well, I feel no country is perfect and every country has its own share of problems.  In my view, it is the few great people which make any country "great". From Buddha, Aryabhatta, Chanakya, Vivekananda, Gandhi, Tagore, Raman, Lata, Sachin, Kalam.....I can put endless list of great people which this land has produced. 

Today I want to talk about one such great son of the soil, with whom I am fortunate to work with. I am talking about Prof. Roddam Narasimha - a leading researcher in science & engineering. As his PhD student, I am proud to know that today he has been honoured with Padma Vibhushan - second highest civilian award of India after Bharat Ratna. 

No, I am not going to talk about his scientific achievements, accolades and awards, for anyone interested can know the above through his volumes of publications and even from wikipedia. I am here to talk about how I know him as a person through day-to-day conversations and why I consider him great. 

In next few months, he is turning 80 and yet he is the busiest person I know in my life. Whether it is guiding 10-odd students/post-docs/research assistants or writing project proposals, reviewing and advising on govt. policies, or researching about the wide spectrum of things he is passionate about - from Turbulence to Tipu's rockets, from Clouds to Clusters, and from  Aircrafts to Ancient Indian Science - he is always busy. So the best time I, along with my other colleagues, get to enjoy with him is the lunch time discussion, and he makes it a point to not to miss lunch with his students. In fact, he emphasizes the importance of student-faculty interaction in research institutions, and that even non-technical discussions should be encouraged.

He is generally very careful in expressing his views in public, and opens up only when he is extremely well prepared. But during the informal discussions at lunch-time, he is more open about discussing any topic. It is through these discussions, we got to know about his endless love and affection towards his country, his visions to make this country great, his frustrations when some policy or propaganda deters the growth of the country, his sadness when something unfortunate happens, and his pride & happiness when India achieves something. 

To quote some events to show his deep emotional involvement to the nation's progress - I remember meeting him the next day after second consecutive failure of ISRO's GSLV mission. He looked little sad. However, on the success of ISRO's 100th mission, he was very happy and discussed about ISRO's achievements at length. We often discuss among ourselves that he has got this childlike curiosity, happiness and sadness in things related to nation.

Many a times our discussion on the lunch table are political, but I have not noticed him taking side of any political party.That doesn't mean he is not interested in Politics. He is more informed about the political landscape in India than many of us are. But rather than taking the view of any political party, he talks about general policies which he feels the government should adopt and is concerned about the policies that are harming the country. For that matter, I have never felt that he binds himself to any kind of ideology - be it communism, capitalism, Marxism etc.He feels India is too complex a country to propose a unique solution based on single ideology. He emphasizes on the need for 'Indian solutions' for 'Indian problems' which could be very different from those commonly addressed by the west. His views are specific, objective, balanced and most importantly free from subscription to any ideology or to the views of any person.  However, he understands the role of leadership and the difference extraordinary people like Mahatma Gandhi can make, and often quotes them. He says "I feel most of the Indian people are simple-minded. What India need is people with great moral authority and I am sure Indian people will listen to such leaders, and this can solve most of the current problems of country."

I have never seen person of such a stature with so small a self-ego. Many a times I ask questions, either technical or otherwise,  which are really ridiculous. He listens carefully and patiently, without showing disappointment. Then, he answers, sometimes after correctly framing my question itself. And during those times, his exact words are - "I am not sure what you are asking for but what you should really ask for is.......".  

Once he was slightly unwell and doctors advised him of complete bed rest. I along with other colleagues, went to see him at his home. After small chit-chat, when we were leaving, he got up from his bed and came to see us till the door. We requested him not to get up from bed, because his doctors have instructed not to do so. His reply was - "It doesn't look good if guests are leaving from your home and you are not seeing them off properly." Such a down-to-earth person he is.

And he is very particular when he writes something - starting from correct use of British english, to punctuation marks. When we give him for his input, any technical paper /report written by us, it will be returned with hundreds of red lines and marks - from correcting technical points to commas and full stops. His usage of "out of circulation" whenever he is out of institution for few days, are often moments of light laughter.

And yes, did I mention he is tech-savvy ? He often discusses about cutting edge technology and keeps himself updated. He speaks with excitement about new-age processors, clusters, ipad, kindle, dropbox and smartphones. So when his old mobile phone stopped working, I grabbed the opportunity to show him the features in my new smartphone and the next day, he bought himself the same smartphone ! 

He always maintains composure and I have never seen him get angry at anyone. We have discussed among ourselves if anyone has ever seen him yell or shout, and one of his old students said the worst he has heard RN say (to someone with whom he was extremely disappointed with) "I don't know why you are wasting my time?"

One of the often asked questions to him is, "what made you to come back to India, when you had so many offers back in US after doing PhD in Caltech under renowned Prof. Hans Liepmann ?". His answer to this is captured in an interview by Sundar

"Well I came back to India because I always wanted to be back in India! I like working in India. It may come as a surprise to many people. I came back in 1962 and It wasn't a big decision for me to take. Well why did I come back? I came from another generation when going back was not considered abnormal! It had nothing to do with opportunities in US being much more than the opportunities back home.. In fact even then, US had more opportunities.. But I had known from my previous experience that it was possible to do this research back in India! In fact, there were some advantages of doing it in India! If you really know what you want to do.. India is even today not a bad place to do research! Of course there are limitations! But large number of bodies exist which support research! There is a new initiative to set up the equivalent of National Science Foundation.. When this board is set up, it will give a considerable boost for doing exciting research in India! Institutions are now hiring people who want to come back to India & continue research. There are large number of fellowships & scholarships. The atmosphere for doing academic research in India is now changing rapidly. "

Few days back, while talking about life of great researcher G.I.Taylor, who stayed in Cambridge for most of his career, the speaker who also happened to be his former student, asked him - "Did your decision of staying back in India helped you in your scientific career?"

His simple reply was - "I am happy."

At age 80, he is younger than many of us. He is a constant learner. He has vision and plans for at least next 10 years for each of his current scientific projects. Two days back I met him in a workshop where people from different countries were speaking on a cutting-edge research topic. After the talks he said - "I am learning more than I can digest."

I am not sure what keeps him so motivated and lively at this age - perhaps it is his never ending curiosity to learn, and more importantly the great love for his country. 

- Rajesh Ranjan 

--With inputs from Saikishan Suryanarayanan (PhD Student of Prof. Narasimha), Prasanth Prabhakaran (M.S. Student of Prof. Narasimha))

Love ?

Much said & debated -

About the facts & the truths,

The past & the future

The corruptions & the scams

The hurdles & the failures

The opinions & the suggestions

The policies & the plans

The philosophies & the 'isms'

The stigmas & the disgrace

The Assam & the Kashmir

And the mind starts questioning

The rationale and logic

Of loving a nation 

So much, so deep

And then I hear

The heart whispering from the inside- 

'Dear Mind!

Did you know -

'The love is always unconditional' ? 

                         

                            - Rajesh 'Arya'

Happy Independence Day!!